Dr. Elizabeth Green

Instructional Designer, Writer, and Free Spirit

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Assume = Ass-u-me

November 19, 2013 by Elizabeth Leave a Comment

assume pixOscar Wilde said, “When you assume, you make an ass out of u and me.  When others do not act as expected, the tendency is to make up a story or assume motives.

  • When a student does not complete a homework assignment, the teacher may assume the student is irresponsible, lazy, or was busy playing video games.
  • When a teacher misses a department or school meeting repeatedly, the teacher-leader may assume the teacher does not place a priority on the meeting or sees tardiness as an attempt to undermine authority.
  • When colleagues do not enforce school rules, such as enforcing dress code violations, a teacher may assume he or she is the only one conscientious and brave enough to take action.

When others violate our expectations, it is easy to make up stories explaining behavior.  When emotions, especially anger are involved, the portion of the brain that is logical ceases to function.  The lower part of our personality takes over and we may:

  • verbally attack the offender;
  • if possible, punish the other person;
  • throw a tantrum;
  • taunt, tease, insult, or use sarcasm; and/or
  • spread the story behind the offender’s back.

Stunned by the violent outburst, the original offender wonders what prompted such a strong reaction.  The cycle continues as he creates his own story about this.

I am reading Crucial Accountability by Patterson, Grenny, Maxfield, McMillan, and Switzler.  More on how to break this cycle,  based on Crucial Accountability in the next post.

A Happy Witch Lives Here

September 24, 2013 by Elizabeth Leave a Comment

 

While decorating our home for fall this weekend, I posted a new decoration near our front door.  It is a sign with a witch hat and reads, “A happy witch lives here.”  When my children were younger, I avoided Halloween symbols with the dark side of Halloween, including witches.  I changed my mind about witches.  I empathize with those falsely accused instead.

My fascination with witches and witch trials began while visiting a witch museum in Salem, Massachusetts.  Before that, I hadn’t given witches much thought other than fairy tales, reading a blurb in my higwitch readyh school history book, and  a watching a few sci-fi movies.  The Salem trials began with accusations from a group of young girls and teenagers and ended with the death of 19 people.  The trials in America’s colonies were not the only witch trials.  In Europe, the church and state hung thousands of individuals after labeling them witches or heretics.  This practice went on for hundreds of years.  American history classes don’t spend much time contemplating the magnitude of the hysteria.

Modern women still feel the need to be pleasing and get along with the group.  After researching the witch trials, I wonder to what extent we can connect our disease to please to the history of mass execution to those who are different, challenge cultural norms, or to avoid jealous accusations.  Our families teach us the cultural lessons passed down from generation to generation.  Some of these on conscious lessons, others are unexamined traditions.  We learn to fear speaking out or being different as the consequences for doing so were severe in previous generations.  Adults teach the young to be nice at the expense of being honest or true to one’s convictions.  Our parents and grandparents encourage girls and young women to put aside our own needs for the convenience of others.  We comply because we don’t want to be a bitch or even worse, a witch.  I speak from a woman’s perspective, but many men fear disappointing others also.

In the witch trial era, anyone could accuse another for being a witch causing the so-called witch to go on trial.  Sometimes the accusations were for jealousy, such as wanting another’s property.  Sometimes people accused another to deflect attention to another.  The accused had to prove innocence.  Just imagine how difficult it would be to prove one did not practice witchcraft!

America’s modern legal system presumes an individual is innocent until proven guilty.  It is too bad we don’t follow this ideology in our daily practices.  Those in leadership positions, such as teachers, Sunday school teachers, PTA leaders, principals, or superintendents are open to criticism.  I do not know of anyone who is able to avoid the jealous or angry critic at some point in his or her career.  The disgruntled can spread stories about another without having to prove anything.  I am not referring to an educator participating in an unethical or illegal activity.  School policies and the justice system have procedures in place to protect both children and educators.  I am concerned that people with ulterior motives spread malicious gossip or rumors that damage educators’ relationships with others, tarnish reputations, and ruin careers.

An angry parent who tells other parents the teacher is unfair or incompetent can damage the teacher’s credibility.  The teacher who tells half-truths about a principal or superintendent harms the leader’s professional reputation.  Both teachers and educators must abide by confidentiality laws.  When a parent complains of unfair discipline, the teacher cannot discuss the incident or defend his position.  It becomes impossible to prove one’s innocence.  The school leader who attempts to help a teacher with ineffective classroom practices or reprimands or dismisses a teacher cannot publicly discuss the situation.  Therefore, the teacher is free to tell one side of the story while the administrator remains silent.  Sometimes the teacher’s story is a half-truth or inaccurate.

Like the accused in the witch trials, it is impossible to prove one’s innocence to vague accusations.  When a parent shares a story of a teacher mistreating a child, notice the words the parent uses.  The parent may blame the teacher for being unfair, picking on an individual student, prejudice against the child for some reason.  This places the teacher in an impossible position to defend.  When a disgruntled teacher states the school leader is defensive or hard to relate to, unfair, or caused low morale among the staff, how can the leader successfully defend her personality or leadership against something that is difficult to quantify?

When disgruntled, petty, or jealous people spread nasty gossip, it is as difficult for modern educators to prove one’s innocence as it was for accused witches to prove she did not fly on a broom at midnight.  It seems hysteria rather than logic still remains alive and well outside the 17th century colonies.  I may adopt the witch as my mascot as a reminder to learn from history.

Setting Back to School Goals with a Vision Board

August 16, 2013 by Elizabeth Leave a Comment

Bulletin board

One of the best ways to help children and teens start the year right, is to take some time to set goals using a vision board.  To manifest a peace and success, we need some time to think about what we want.  I am sharing how to do this with young children to upper elementary age children in this post.  Tomorrow, I will share how to do this with teens.

  1. Set aside some quiet time to do this activity without the distraction of television or other media.  It is great to do this with siblings or a small group of children, as they can share ideas about what they want for the new school year and stimulate creativity.
  2. Ask children what they want for this school year.  This may include making certain grades or marks, reaching goals in sports, or participating in activities such as choir or even an item such as a skateboard or bicycle.  Children will write down their ideas.  For young children, the parent or teacher may record the answers for them.
  3. Share the idea that abundance can also mean what we are, as well as what we have or achieve.  Perhaps we want to be kinder to others, raise money for a cause, or share more.  As children begin to talk about their dreams, record the ideas and introduce the concept that we can make a vision board to help us achieve our dreams.
  4. When we develop a vision board, we use symbols to represent what we want.  The board can be a bulletin board, magnetic marker board, or as simple as cardboard or paper.  Cut out pictures, words, symbols to represent what we want.  Children may also draw pictures of vision board items.  This is even more powerful.  Add these to the board.
  5. Ask children to be specific.  If we want a bicycle, note the color, style of seat, and any other details.  Note when we want to achieve our vision.  If we want to make the A-B honor roll, note which grading periods.  If we simply want to be on the honor roll, this may not be until the last grading or marking period.  We need to write, I want to make the A-B honor roll every grading period this school year. 
  6. Ask children to make one really big goal for the year that seems impossible, something that will really stretch their imaginations.
  7. Post the vision board in a place the child will see every day.  Some ideas include inside the locker door or in the child’s bedroom.  Seeing the board every day will remind students of their goals. 
  8.  Observe the Law of Attraction work for children as well as adults.

Great Beginnings

August 12, 2013 by Elizabeth Leave a Comment

School Supplies 3

School is starting very soon.  As a student, I loved the first day of school with new beginnings, a new page in the grade book, a new start.  I loved the smell of paste, my cigar box full of #2 pencils, new crayons with sharp points.  I looked forward to seeing my friends and hoped my new teacher was nice to me.  There is something magic about the first day and a fresh start.

As a teacher and school leader and consultant, I love the freshly waxed floor – so bright you can see your reflection, greeting colleagues he first day back, and the sight of yellow school buses full of children.  I love the first band practice, football game, and the tired but satisfied feeling of making it through a full first week.  I also love the new page in a grade book – now a grading software program.  Every child has a new beginning.  There is nothing better than seeing students get a successful beginning.  Everyone deserves a fresh start.

Great beginnings don’t just happen.  A great deal of work goes into the first few days of school.  The custodians work all summer to prepare the building.  Teachers attend workshops and training all summer to improve their craft.  Administrators work on schedules, curriculum planning, and manage bus schedules.  Parents shop the sales to make sure their children have what they need for the first day.  All of these activities to ensure success begin with thoughts and actions.  When we have bad beginnings, it is usually because we did not take the time to plan and to pay attention to what we want.  We take what comes to us rather than creating a peaceful school year.  When we are not conscious of our goals, thoughts, actions, we typically have a poor start that can take us longer to overcome.

Physically and metaphorically, we have a new page in this years’ grade book.  Let’s spend some time  setting goals for the year and affirming success and peace for children and ourselves? Putting our thoughts and attention to this will make a great beginning.  My next posts will include ideas for visioning activities, creating a vision board for teachers and students, setting up class rules, and tips for making the morning rush peaceful.  I hope you will share your ideas also.

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Hi! I'm Elizabeth. ...a researcher, educator, instructional designer, writer, mom, activist, and optimist, and this is my personal blog.  I mostly write about educational issues, but can get sidetracked into issues that I find interesting or timely.   Disclaimer This is my personal … Read More...

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Hi! I'm Elizabeth. ...a researcher, educator, instructional designer, writer, mom, activist, and optimist, and this is my personal blog.  I mostly write about educational issues, but can get … Read More...

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